*looks at time rite now*
and it reads: 12.15am?hah.
random.
why am i posting at such a late hour?hmm no idea.
maybe it helps to kill time and errm at the least,keep me awake.
well,today appeared to be really dramatic.
i woke up to have breakfast and went tgt with my mum down to tampines to do something which may appear ridiculous to you guys out there.
to sign up for physics tuition,which is commencing at 10am tmr,and also for the consecutive sundays.
i was the one who came up with that crazy idea.
but hahh.december's approaching and so is the year2007.
and soon,i'll be on my way to the olvls.
peparation,mental preparation.yup i guess tats wat i need.
and now tuition's a need for me(:
insane thoughts huh=/

my night was wayy amazing.
i was amazed tat a book could actually made tears roll down like nobody's business.
tuesdays with morrie,a true story.
a story,or rather a lecture,that touched my life and also the lives of others(:
i've learnt the true meaning of life and also to face it with acceptance.

so many people walk around with a meaningless life.
they seem half-asleep,even when they're busy doing things they think are important.
this is because they are chasing the wrong things.
the way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others,devote youself to your community around you,and devote yourself to create something that gives you purpose and meaning.

i guess,im one of those victims out there who are somewhat half-alseep.
although i dun seem to find my direction of life now,but i swear,sooner or later i would.
yup.devote myself to loving those people who showed care for me and also to the community,which appears foreign and unknown to me.
but,as what the five people you meet in heaven says,
strangers are families you've yet come to know.aint it?

learn to detach.
detachment doesn't mean you don't let the experience penetrate you.
on the contrary,you let it penetrate you fully.
that's how you're able to leave it.

i think i have to get some sleep now,although i still have the temptation to go on with this emotional post and typing more meaningful quotes & phrases.
blahh.got to get up early tmr=/
physics physics physics.
buhbyes(:
-tension of opposites
i need to be decisive for once,for the sake of no one,but myself.

BREAK FREE;
[a] 8:22 AM

HAHH.im back from my trip to malaysia.
it wasn't exactly a memorable one,but at least i did enjoy myself to some extent.
yepp.i was practically stuffing myself with LOTS of food throughout the whole journey and always ended up bloated.
must have gained lotsa calories after eating those fattening stuff=X
oh yah.not forgetting to mention,the bus was real high class man.
huge, comfy seats(: HEH.
but i just do have difficulty sleeping in a bus.my neck's aching till now.
and as result,ive developed serious eye bags due to insufficient sleep.
ohoh.and guess wat?we reached our hotel at 2AM.amazing huhh.
what we've been doing was just walking,eating,shopping.and the whole cycle just repeats itself?lolls.
did nth much.but i saw the real batik! not printed frm factories,but hand drawn(:
you wouldnt believe how fast those workers can draw on the cloth.
their speed of drawing would just make you stare and even go 'woooaaahh'.
...
shucks.im lost for words again.
nvr mind.i shall put up some pictures then(:


we share the same room(:
i thought this was artistic.HAHH(x


taken when we made a trip to a chocolate factory(:
NICE chocolates.they look really tempting huhh.


thats the process of making a batik.
-drawing with wax-

-painting-

-the result!-

a&w ice cream waffle!YUM((:
rare food that most probably cant be found in s'pore!
but it looks a lil disgusting frm this angle lah=X


a&w root beer(x

hahh.im reading 'the five people you meet in heaven' currently(:
a real meaningful book that tells you what life's all about.
nice quotes can be found everywhere.
and yup.i shall list them down here to share them with you guys out there.

no life's a waste.
the only time we waste is the time we spend thinking that we're alone.

death doesn't just take someone,it misses someone else, and in the small distance between being taken and being missed,lives are changed.

strangers are just family you have yet come to know.

sometimes when you sacrifice something precious,you're not really losing it.
you're just passing it on to someone else(:

yays(: meaningful,aren't they?
well,im just halfway thru the book so they're more to come.
shall end off here then.
buhbyes!(:

-never let your heart rule your mind?
maybe it's just the other way round.

BREAK FREE;
[a] 5:28 AM

im losing a sense of direction in my life,i guess.
have you guys ever wondered what's your goal in life?
what are you studying for?what do you actually want?
i remembered someone stopping me on the streets earlier this year,asking me tat question.
and i was momentarily,lost for words,not knowing wat on earth i should say.
studying for the sake of studying,am i?
and ended up thinking that results are kind of the most important thing in my life?
or rather,am i doing all these just for the sake of the high hopes that my parents have casted on me?
what exactly have i done for myself?
indeed,ive been escaping.and should i continue to do so?
*slaps myself back to reality*
hahh.stupid of me to think of such stuff huh.
my thoughts are going wrong,wrong WRONG.
do results really matter tat much in the first place?
is it worth getting into some sort of a depression because of studies?
NAH.it isn't.it definitely isn't.
secthree has been a tough year for me.
it has also been the year when i somehow,changed my perspective towards studies.
ive been taking it too seriously,and im aware of tat.
shedding tears due to disappointing results and getting all so stressed up due to exams and tests that were coming up.
i was dumb.really dumb.
its the journey that's more important,isn't it?
hahh.im such an idiot.

pessimistic post.yes,it is.
im in a horrible mood right now.
negative thoughts are just killing,torturing my darn brain.
somehow,i wished i could just bang myself hard against the wall.
maybe through tat way,i'll then suffer from a memory loss or something.
FREE my thoughtss.
my life's entirely screwed at the moment.
-hatred's filling me.

BREAK FREE;
[a] 7:30 AM

wen shi jian qing wei he wu,
zhi jiao sheng si xiang xu?
random quote.
but somehow,that's the only phrase that comes straight into my mind after watching a series of dramas.
i wonder if one would truly make sacrification for the one he/she loves.
as what ive seen from the dramas,love's such a (how shld i put it) beautiful thing?
a person who makes your life more meaningful.
and perhaps,you'd be willing to do anything for an exchange of his/her smile.
well,but i have to admit that they're all dramatic.
or in other words,im utterly confused.
i realised tat ive been immature all along.
misunderstandings of my own feelings..blahblah.shant continue any further.
but yeah,i realised ive got absolutely no rights to talk abt this at the moment.
the feeling just isnt there=/
im just a childish,idiotic person on earth.
sighhs..

ohwell.im being really random again.
hah sorry.
apparently,ive lost the interest in making an effort to blog frequently.
partially due to the fact that..not many people seem to be looking at this deserted blog?
hahh.this may be good in certain ways.
firstly,it helps to reduce spammage on my tagboard..
and probably through this way,i would then be able to type put my true feelings?
hahh.this doesnt seem to make any link.
i guess im typing out this post to fuyan you guys out there=/
okayy.cut the crap.i have to post something tats got to be related to my life huh.
well,my throat isnt showing any signs of improvement.
pain pain and MORE pain.
or rather,looking at another point of view,im not doing anything to help myself either.
ive been eating fried food,chocolates and MORE fried food.
and im kinda addicted to fishermen sweets recently.
strong mint and somehow it makes me feel comfortable((:
LOL.im hoping tat it'll create a 'yu du gong du' effect in a way=/

i took a looonng 'mrt and bus' ride back home today.
it was kind of a terrible ride,as i was alone.
yup.sometimes,i just hate being alone..
cos it's the time when i'll be overwhlemed with all sorts of emotions and my thoughts would somehow go wild,pratically staring at evrythg i see.
and tears would just flow down unknowingly..
hah.i know it's kind of weird lah.
but tats wat normally happens when im alone.
i hate it when my feelings turn sour.
i hate it when im being forced to think about things which i hope that i can escape from.
i truly want to free myself from such negative thoughts.
i truly want to stay happy,not just on the surface,but from deep down my heart.
NAHH.*whacks myself*
my thoughts are drifting too far.im sorry=X
anyway,i prevented myself from thinking by reading a book.
i was absoultely engrossed, kind of fascinated with the events taking place in the book.
but it turned out to be a bad experience after all.
i was on the edge of throwing up when i got off the bus=//
felt giddy you know.
it was a bad choice to read in a bus. :(

lalala.i shall not let this turn into a pessimistic post.
gansherli has gotta smile! uh huhs.
sounds a lil dumb huh=X
well,im going on a trip to kuala lumpur this coming friday.
really looking forward to play,shop and eat!(x
3 days, two nights.rather short..
hahah.im lost for words right now.
shall end off this post then.
buhbyess(:

let bygones be by bygones.
things are definitely gonna turn for the better-

BREAK FREE;
[a] 5:54 AM

i guess im updating more often than anyone else huh.
but well,it isn't a good thing after all as im really running out of things to say.
my posts just dun seem to link after some while and my thoughts will somehow just go haywire.
but posting kills boredom!which therefore explains why im here every now and then=/
lol.random-ness
well,im not feeling very well now.
ive got this sudden burning sensation down my throat and there seems to be an ulcer appearing near my gums.
the pain is just unbearable.
i feel as if the left side of my throat is entirely swollen.
oucch.and ive got difficulty swallowing stuff now,and that includes drinking water.
im in serious PAIN.ughh.
ohwell.that's a result of eating too much heaty stuff recently.
popcorns,titbits,fast food,chocolates.
im guilty and i jolly well know that the pain im undergoing now is definitely a retribution or something.
sighh.im praying that this sore throat doesn't lead to a fever or any form of sickness that's probably gonna take away half of my life.
and frankly,im starving right now.hah.
the feeling's definitely ugh.undescribable.

went to vivo city to catch a movie again.
somehow the experience is different,in terms of the fun i had.
duh.a date with eunice is always exciting as she never fails to make me laugh at her lame jokes or lame actions?lol.no offence.
anyway,we watched the movie- step up.
it was god damn COOL mann.
yeahh mann.lol.
for your info,im trying to imitate a guy in the movie.
okay,this doesn't seem to make any sense.
but,it was my first time sitting at the second row from the screen.
bad experience,i must say.
it was lucky that my neck didn't get sprained or something,but well,it still hurts.
raising ur head up for 2 straight hours isn't fun okay.
but, i shall take it as an experience or rather a lesson learnt.
i swear that i'll never sit in front again=/
anyway,back to the content of the movie.
i love those people dancing to the music,esp the male and female lead.
they can dance really well.
i truly admire those flexible movements that they can make.
it'll just make me stare into the screen with urm,my mouth wide opened?lol.
it was also the first movie that i watched which doesn't include subtitles.
which means,i have to actually figure out what the black angmohs and the white angmohs were trying to say.(im trying hard not to be racist here)
okay.to be precise,black and white americans yah?=/
they just got this slang in their speech which i dun seem to understand.hahh.
i guess im saving up money to buy the soundtrack of this movie.
i just lovee those songs((:

well,
im feeling damn restless now.
and my entire body's aching like mad.
shall stop here then.
seeyah(:

BREAK FREE;
[a] 3:17 AM

Hold a friend's hand through times of trial,
Let her find love through a hug and a smile;
But also know when it is time to let go
-For each and everyone of us must learn to grow. (:
awws*
does this sound familiar eunice?((x
hahah.just got this sudden urge to post sum meaningful quotes up here.
yups(:
a friend in need,is a friend in deed.
lols.im getting way too emotional=/
well,nothing much happened today.
so im just typing this random post to kill boredom.hah.

"Each friend represents a world in us,
a world possibly not born until they arrive,
and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born."
- Anais Nin

random random.

BREAK FREE;
[a] 4:56 AM

heys im back once again(:
im kinda sick of repeating that phrase again and again every time i start typing a post.
HAH.but oh wells,my english is wayy bad.
unless someone is able to help me come up with a sentence more entertaining than tat=/
loll.okay that's a little random.
i thought of continuing the list of friends ytd,but sad to say,i felt really restless.
and the feeling's somehow not there.
sorry if i missed out some of you guys but yeah,i will try to complete that list when the feeling's back.
im a weirdo=//

was supposed to 'have fun' in escape theme park ytd as my sis agreed to pay for our trip there.
i must say that i had phobia going there at first.
i remembered vomitting twice as i could not take those thrilling rides.(esp the pirate ship,which nvr fails to make my heart lose a beat)
but since it was a free trip,i might as well give it a try again.
so yup,i went with my sis,her bf and my small little cousin.
but to our dismay,it was CLOSED.
hahhh.that kind of destroyed the day.
i didnt know that escape theme park only opens during weekends and public holidays=/
so as we walked back to the bus stop,we came up with lots of suggestions on the next place we shall go.
ideas like going to the zoo,jurong bird park and ecp start popping out.
it was lame,i know.but singapore is small and boring yah.
in the end,i suggested going to vivo city!
i thought it was a great idea as it was my first time going there and i wanna catch a movie too((:
the others agreed and we took a mrt from pasir ris all the way to harbour front.
a long jorney indeed,but it was worthwhile(:
vivo city was WAAAYYYY huge.
although it's not officially opened yet,but everythg was almost done.
there were countless shops arranged in a confusing,yet unique manner.
the sceneries are NICE too(x great place for relaxation.
we went to catch 'the guardian' at golden village after shopping around a quarter of the place.
yup.that really explains how big it is(:
the guardian was nice and touching.
it made me laugh at some dumb scenes and also made my tears fall.
sounds ironic,but well,my mood's affected after the whole thing ended.
just got this sudden mood swing and i started ignoring the people around me.
im really a weirdo=/
but i had fun ytd.alot alot of fun(x

and i managed to watch the ending episode of weixiao pasta!
it was FREAKIN niiccee(:
touching,heart-wrenching and HAPPY!awws*
i lovee weixiao pasta<33
okay im obsessed with this show.
THREE CHEERS for a happy ending((:

BREAK FREE;
[a] 10:02 PM

heys! im back once again(:
decided to update my blog more often now.
well,i hope that it can help to kill boredom in a way or another yah?
lols.ive decided to split my reflection of this year into a number of posts.
maybe due to the fact that ive got coutntless things to talk abt and also countless people to thank(:
so yup.this will be the very first part and i hope that it does not bore you guys as i got this feeling that this post is gonna be exceptionally looooonnngg.
PART ONE: giving thanks(:
i would really really like to thank all my friends who have given me the support throughout this entire year,helping me along,and also comforting me when im down.
yups.even though it's just a matter of giving me a pat of my back or a sms to cheer me up,it really does matter alot to me.
and for now,i wanna express my gratitude to you guys,one by one.

samantha
hey gurl! lols.
i do remember the days when we once go crazy tgt in 2beeohfive.
always being late for class as you and mandice tend to eat at a really slow speed.
and also not forgetting those home ec classes when i was working tgt with you as a partner.
we always forgot to bring our rags and apron to sch rmb?
LOL.as a result,we had to sweep the floor and close the windows after every homec lesson.
we always ended up getting scolded tgt while sewing that stupid pink cloth.
mdmteo really do hate us huh?
i really miss those days :(
although we're in different classes now,but i still would like to thank you for being such a great fren last yr.
and also thanks for that HUGE pat on my back that you wld always give me every time i walked past you.
seriously,it hurts=/ lols.
register 9 and 10 hmm ROCKS(x
tats a lil random.hahah.

mandice
MANDICE LIEU.a spastic friend.
lols.seriously,i really missed those days when we were once sitting tgt, gossiping with pris and qinqin.
i would always see you dozing off in such a 'nice' manner and always not getting caught.
and also,you and your spastic jokes tat never fails to make me laugh.
thanks for entertaining me so much yah?
although it sounds a lil dumb but yah, thanks(:
just wanna say that i really did enjoy myself when we were having our lunch at seoul garden tat day.
although pris wasnt able to join us tat day,i still thought tat it was a blessing in disguise.
the two of us did have a great time i guess.
scooping ice-cream from the ice-cream tubs,cooking the chickens and boiling the hot-dogs.
hahah.i really had fun that day(:
although i have to admit that we're not as close as before,due to some reasons, but you're still a great fren of mine!
thanks for making my life in 3h a memorable one(:

EUNICE((:
EUNICESHI! be honoured that your name is in caps lock yah?lols.
i still rmb the day when i first got to know you,or rather,you first got to know me.
-xiang dang chu wo shi zen me ren shi ni!(x
i was sitting in front of you, i guess.
it was the day when we had our cca orientation yah?
and i wrote my class as 6/1 when it's supposed to be 1b instead.
and you tapped on my shoulder,saying that i wrote it wrongly.
seriously,at that moment of time,i felt really embarrassed=/
and from then,fate starts playing an important part in our friendship.awws*
we actually got into the same cca!LOL.
thats when i really got to know you and also realise that you're a great friend to be with(:
we've been slacking alot during cca time, gossiping and talking our hearts out.
and i guess that the seniors had really given up on us yah?=X
but i must say that i really enjoyed your companion.
you never fail to give me the greatest consoles when im down.
you would always try to understand how exactly i was feeling then.
and for all that you've done,THANKS!(:
i enjoyed every outing with you,eating tgt,taking nice nice neos,watching movies and also, not forgetting our trip to kbox!
thanks for dedicating all those love songs to me yeah?<33 our dates are always so memorable.LOL. i guess our friendship is gonna last for eternity yah?
THANKYOU SO MUCH!
you've made my journey this year worthwile(:
*sakura sakura
sa man qing chun de mo fa
ca gan yan lei shuo sheng zai hui dou shi cheng zhang de dai jia-

siewting-HAM(:
HEYYS dumbdumb.it's finally your turn!LOLS.
well,what can i say?
you've always been creating so much entertainment in my life with your oh-so-lame jokes.
you never fail to make the atmosphere freezing cold.lols.
conclusion: siewting's lame and childish(:
okay that's the end of your part.
wahhahah.okay lah.i was just joking.
but seriously,u never fail to make me laugh,whether it is talking on msn or talking to you in person.
sometimes i would just laugh my head off while looking at your conversation in the com.and at tat moment of time,the ppl around me were thinking tat im mad.
HAH.it's all your fault lah,foosiewting.
SLAPPPPPPSSSS.hahh.my daily slaps(x
okay lah.ive got to be serious and stop crapping.
siewting ah.i seriously think that you're a potential psychologist you know?
you're always able to read my mind and figure out how im feeling when i was even unsure of myself.
it's a little scary sumtimes,when i cum to think about it.
but i have to admit that you've been giving me great help all these times.
thanks for your support and encouragement when i was confused and down.
thanks for your understanding and thanks for always being able to look thru my troubles even without me telling you.
thanks for giving me a pat on the back when i was really stressed up during the exam period.
thanks for always attempting to dry my tears.
YOU ROCK! (:
lol.and also..i will never forget our most spastic moments during practicals in the science labs.
HAHAH.
SEWTING IS SPASTIC!

i shall stop here for the moment.
will continue this list tmr(:
my eyes are painful. seeyah.

BREAK FREE;
[a] 5:22 AM

http://lost-within-dreams.blogspot.com
okayy.just wanna help siewting to advertise her newly-created blog.
i must say tat the words are urmm,small.
frankly speaking,i was like straining my eyes while reading.
no offence =X but siewting's english is way above my standard lah.
*looks above* AHH.i see siewting!>.<
i just spammed her tagboard.LOLS.

well,back to some serious stuff.
im seriously developing hatred against my hair,day by day.
every morning as i brush my teeth and look into the mirror..
omg.my hair is like, wow.messed up.
i wished i could turn back time and NOT step into that salon tat day.
sighhhs.my life's screwed.
the holidays have officially begun after the olvls on monday.
but hmm.how should i put it.
im not in the mood to play.
i mean my mind's just not on the right 'track' this few days.
have been thinking about many many other stuff that will seriously make tears fall.
but yup.ive learnt to hold back tears and stay strong.
im definitely not gonna let anyone be affected my negative thoughts and feelings.
esp those who have been playing an important in my life(:

i suppose tat there arent many activities going on during the holidays,for me in particular.
well,what can i say?
im BORED.extremely bored.
and im officially broke too.hah.
have been spending quite alot ever since the exams ended in october.
went to seoul garden with mandice,and tat reminds me tat i still owe her 3bucks=/
went kbox twice.godd.tats qte a huge sum of money spent you know.
all the fast food that fills my stomach and also not forgetting the neos that ive been taking so far. that really explains why my pocket has a hole right now..
and coming to think that my sis birthday is on this sunday?
omg.i really cant fork out the money to buy a gift for her.
jie.im sorry yah=X

i dunno how to drag this post any longer.
hah.nothing much occurred during the past few days.
life has been quite plain and hmm.dumb.
BOOS.i dun like it.
but i needa to cherish the boredom before school reopens nxt year again.
two months time,which seems long.
but you'd never know how fast time flies yah?
im not looking forward to next year.not at all looking forward to the olvls.
haishh.
year 2006 is gonna to cum to an end real soon.
and not long after this,i'll be doing a reflection here,typing a long post on how exactly ive been feeling throught this long,yet seemingly short year.
i must say tat it has been a meaningful yr for me.
went through alot and yup.learnt to be stronger(:
realised that ive got many great friends around me.
and of course,their consoles which really matter.
awwws* thanks(:

-zhi yao xiao yi xiao,mei shen me shi qing guo bu liao.
weixiao pasta is NICEE(x
looking forward to the last epi tat is gonna be out soon.hahah.
seeyah guys then.with my reflection of the year(:
it would most probably be an emotional one..
buhbyes(:

BREAK FREE;
[a] 7:19 AM